Criminal - Eminem
A lot of people ask me
Stupid f**kin questions
A lot of people think that
What I say on records
Or what I talk about on a record
That I actually do in real life
Or that I believe in it
Or if I say that I wanna kill somebody that
I'm actually gonna do it
Or that I believe in it
Well shit if you believe that
Then I'll kill you
You know why
Cuz I'm a
Criminal
Criminal
You God damn right
I'm a criminal
Yeah I'm a criminal
My words are like a dagger with a jagged edge
That'll stab you in the head
Whether youre a fag or lez
Or the homosex
Hermaph or a trans-a-vest
Pants or dress - hate fags
The answers yes
Homophobic
Nah youre just heterophobic
Starin at my jeans
Watchin my genitals bulgin (ooh )
Thats my motherf**kin balls
Youd better let go of em
They belong in my scrotum
Youll never get hold of em
Hey it's me versace
Whoops somebody shot me
And I was just checkin the mail
Get it checkin the male
How many records you expectin to sell
After your second lp sends you directly to jail
Cmon -- relax guy
I like gay men
Right ken give me an amen (aaa-men )
Please lord this boy needs jesus
Heal this child help us destroy these demons
Oh and please send me a brand new car
And a prostitute while my wifes sick in the hospital
Preacher preacher fifth grade teacher
You cant reach me my mom cant neither
You cant teach me a goddamn thing cause
I watch tv and comcast cable
And you aint able to stop these thoughts
You cant stop me from toppin these charts
And you cant stop me from droppin each march
With a brand new cd for these f**kin retards
Duhhh and to think it's just little ol me
Mr don't give a f**k still wont leave
I'm a criminal
Cuz every time I write a rhyme
These people think it's a crime
To tell em whats on my mind
I guess I'm a criminal
But I don't gotta say a word
I just flip em the bird
And keep goin I dont take shit from no one
Cuz every time I write a rhyme
These people think it's a crime
To tell em whats on my mind
I guess I'm a criminal
But I don't gotta say a word
I just flip em the bird
And keep goin I dont take shit from no one
My mother did drugs - tar
Liquor cigarettes and speed
The baby came out - disfigured
Ligaments indeed
It was a seed who would grow up just as crazy as she
Don't dare make fun of that baby cause that baby was me
Im a criminal - an animal caged who turned crazed
But how the f**k you sposed to grow up when you werent raised
So as I got older and I got a lot taller
My dick shrunk smaller but my balls got larger
I drink malt liquor to f**k you up quicker
Than youd wanna f**k me up for sayin the word
My morals went thhbbpp when the president got oral
Sex in his oval office on top of his desk
Off of his own employee
Now dont ignore me you wont avoid me
You cant miss me Im white blonde-haired
And my nose is pointy
Im the bad guy who makes fun of people that die
In plane crashes and laughs
As long as it aint happened to him
Slim shady Im as crazy as em
Inem and kim combined - kch the maniacs in
Replacin the doctor cause dre couldnt make it today
Hes a little under the weather so Im takin his place
(mm-mm-mmm ) oh thats dre with an ak to his face
Dont make me kill him too
And spray his brains all over the place
I told you dre
You shouldve kept that thang put away
I guess thatll teach you not to let me play with it eh
Im a criminal
Aight look (uh huh) just go up in that motherf**ker
Get the motherf**kin money and get the f**k up outta there
(em) aight
Ill be right here waitin on you
(em) aight
Yo em
(em) what
Dont kill nobody this time
(em) awwright God damn f**k
(whistling) how you doin
(teller) hi how can I help you
(eminem) yeah I need to make a withdrawl
(teller) okay
(eminem) put the f**kin money in the bag bitch
And I wont kill you
(teller) what oh my god dont kill me
(eminem) I'm not gonna kill you bitch quit lookin around
(teller) don't kill me please don't kill me
(eminem) I said I'm not gonna f**kin kill you
Hurry the f**k up thank you
Windows tinted on my ride when I drive in it
So when I rob a bank run out and just dive in it
So Ill be disguised in it
And if anybody identifies the guy in it
I'll hide for five minutes
Come back shoot the eyewitness
Fire at the private eye hired to pry in my business
Die bitches bastards brats pets
This puppys lucky I didn't blast his ass yet
If I ever gave a f**k Id shave my nuts
Tuck my dick inbetween my legs and cluck
You motherf**kin chickens aint brave enough
To say the stuff I say so this tape is shut
Shit half the shit I say I just make it up
To make you mad so kiss my white naked ass
And if its not a rapper that I make it as
I ma be a f**kin rapist in a jason mask