The Gnu Song - Flanders & Swann

　　A year ago last Thursday I was strolling in the zoo

　　When I met a man who thought he knew the lot

　　He was laying down the law about the habits of baboons

　　And the number of quills a porcupine has got

　　So I asked him "What's that creature there ”

　　He answered "Oh it's a h-elk"

　　I might have gone on thinking that was true

　　If the animal in question hadn’t put that chap to shame

　　And remarked "I h-ain't a h-elk I'm a g-nu"

　　“I'm a g-nu

　　I'm a g-nu

　　The g-nicest work of g-nature in the zoo

　　I'm a g-nu

　　How do you do

　　You really ought to k-now w-ho’s w-ho "

　　"I'm a g-nu spelt G-N-U

　　I'm g-not a camel or a kangaroo

　　So let me introduce

　　I'm g-neither man or moose

　　Oh g-know g-know g-know

　　I'm a g-nu "

　　I had taken furnished lodgings down at Rustington-On-Sea

　　Whence I travelled on to Ashton-Under-Lime it wasactually

　　And the second night I stayed there I was wakened froma dream

　　Which I'll tell you all about some other time

　　Among the hunting trophies on the wall above my bed

　　Stuffed and mounted was a face I thought I knew

　　A bison No it's not a bison An ocapi It's unlikely really

　　Could it be a hartebeest

　　When I seemed to hear a voice: “I'm a g-nu"

　　"I'm a g-nu

　　A g-nother g-nu

　　I wish I could g-nash my teeth at you

　　I'm a g-nu

　　How do you do

　　You really ought to k-now w-ho's w-ho ”

　　"I'm a g-nu spelt G-N-U

　　Call me 'bison' or 'ocapi' and I'll sue

　　G-nor am I in the least

　　Like that dreadful hartebeest

　　Oh g-no g-no g-no

　　G-know g-know g-know I'm a g-nu

　　G-know g-know g-know I'm a g-nu

　　That's very g-nice of you